Thursday, August 28, 2008

Paula + Biden vs Obama = family arguments

Most of you don't know Paula. But the reason for this blog is to have a place to keep all my BS. so:


Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Thirsty Grizelda?


Dear Jean Hill,

You were splendorific as Grizelda. Your sex scene with Mink Stole was the first time I have ever seen men leave the room while two ladies were getting it on. Bravo. I cheered you killing the evil Mr. Gravel and his rot inducing touch. I welcomed you putting Peggy in her place. I laughed at your makeover. I guffaded at your dialoge. And I kicked my heels at your ability to aclimate with even the worst of surroundings (Mortville)
But most of all I lamented your untimely death. To have a house fall on you as if you were in a different move all very sad.

Jean!? Are you still alive in real life? When ever I try to search for information about you I only get hits for a woman who was near JFK when he was killed. She doesn't look like you, so I'm guessing you are just two people, two people with the same name. So I'm stuck, not knowing if you are alive. Only having three movies to see you in. And really Grizelda was your shining part. A supporting part, none of this "extra" crap.

So Desperate Living all i have is some delightful quotes:

Peggy: Go ahead, feel her up! Just like you did to me! Find em, feel em, fuck em, forget em... is THAT your new motto?
Grizelda: Zip that gaping hole of a mouth up, Peggy, before I plug it up with my fist.
Peggy: You're just like all the rest of the common dykes in this town!

Grizelda:“I am sick of listenin’ to your bitchin’. The next time you feel a fit comin’ on, go outside and bitch. Bitch at the air. Bitch at the trees. But don’t bitch at us!”

Grizelda: We killed your husband, and I ain't your maid any more, bitch! I'm yo sister in crime!

Honestly John Waters, we need more Jean Hill. But she was in A Dirty SHame, you'll say. That wasn't a part. Not a part at all John. on that note, you're not writing Mink Stole very well anymore, but that's another blog.... So come on give me more Jean


More. More Jean

John. John, more Jean, Please.

Thursday, August 21, 2008

Love Child

So most soon to be parents really want to know what their baby will look like. Why? I'm not sure. What I am sure of is that knowing months ahead of time that you are going to have an ugly baby will ruin the miracle of birth.

That said, there are many websites (note: I am not sure that this is true) that will give you an idea of whether your bundle of joy will make people gasp with cuteness or horror. one of these sights is I'd like to point out here and now that I'm not sure how it works because I uploaded two ugly dogs (literally) and they came out with a human, albeit ugly, baby.

Munchkin & Sam

See human looking....

Now the reason for this post is for the baby that Salim and I will be having. I don't know if it is because Salim looks like a zombie, as mentioned in a previous post but....

Here it she is with minor edits.....

zombie baby

Monday, August 4, 2008


So many of you, Amy most of all, think Munchkin is hideous. One friend went so far as to refer to her as a creepy cat thing.

Well after months of looking at her as my work computer background I have decided that she is ugly/cute and after reading her "bio" i heart her even more. [the bio is below the pictures]

Go Munchkin!!!!!

A lovely side view for you
munchkin-side view

here we have Munchkins most unnatractive photo which i think looks like Salvador Dali:

see i went so far as to submit the comparison to a website.

salvador dali, munchkin, world's ugliest dog
see more famous faces look-a-likes

Here we have the "cute" picture I have grown to love:

And finally what she would look like with a little trim:

"Munchkin is approximately 8 years old. Her dog breed is affectionately known as a “Canardly” (as in “you can hardly tell). She
could be part affenpinscher (monkey face) terrier but her vet is convinced she is a “one of a kind” unique dog.

I saw Munchkin’s photo in 2004 on Pets Unlimited website and laughed. Anything that tickled my tummy so much has to come
home with me. I drove to San Francisco and Paulie, the adoption counselor, took me to meet Munchkin. When she waddled &
snorted her way from underneath the adoption counselor desk, tears of joy welled up. She was identical to my previous 6-time
Worlds Ugliest dog, Nana; only 15 lbs. heavier!!! I sat on the floor and she leaned against me, looking up at me with her soulful
eyes, & rolled over for me to scratch her tummy. We bonded immediately and it was if she was asking “what took you so long to
find me?” Paulie noticed it was an obvious love connection and offered an “on sale” price of $75, a substantial reduction from the
regular adoption price (little did he know, I would have happily paid any price). Munchkin had been rescued from another animal
shelter just in time and had been at Pets Unlimited for 8 months with no interest by potential adopters. Pets Unlimited is located
in the heart of San Francisco’s hills among the Victorian homes. Pets Unlimited places poster size photos of available pets in the
large windows facing the busy street. As months went by, no one came for Munchkin until I came along. Why someone couldn’t
see her beauty & charm is beyond me.

Dogs like Munchkin don’t come around that often. She is special not just for her looks – but her personality which really shines
beneath all of those extra pounds. Visually she grabs you by the eyes, but emotionally she gets right into your heart with a sweet
kiss on the face or rolling over for a belly rub. As a pet therapy volunteer, Munchkin has helped so many people heal and find
comfort – whether she’s visiting a hospital for children, who giggle in delight when they see her or at a nursing home, making each
day brighter for a lucky resident, Munchkin was meant to be in the spotlight. Although she remained in a shelter for many, many
months, ignored and shown pity by those who visited, her new life has given Munchkin a better purpose in life – to make people
smile everywhere she goes. Her rags to riches story is truly a lesson for us all to never judge a book by its cover.

The reactions when people first encounter Munchkin vary. Because she snorts when she walks, and the hair on her back is short
& wiry, people ask, “what is that pig doing here?” Other people refer to Munchkin as a relative of Don King (boxing promoter) or
Cruella De Vil (from 101 Dalmatians) because her hair around her head & neck is very long, mostly gray, and stands straight up
without any “product” assistance."

Refuse vs Refuse

Ok kids, i'm going to clear up some confusion. We all know the English language is difficult sucks. Some words are spelt the same but sound different, or sound the same but are spelt different. Come ON! Today lets look at Refuse.

–verb (used with object)
to decline to accept; to decline to give; deny.

something that is discarded as worthless or useless; rubbish; trash; garbage.

Cereal - Refuse

Make sense? If not you can message me.

About Me

My photo
i sneeze a lot but you usually cannot tell that it happened. I drink black coffee all the time so my tooths are yellow.